Analogy

This is exactly how I feel about Woody Allen movies...

Carbon Tax: my take

I’m sorry. I’ve tried not to get political on this blog. I’ve kept my fingers off the keyboard every time they started itching, but this raging Carbon Tax ridiculousness has really pushed me beyond my limits. I’ve been watching the progress of Australia from pseudo-sensible placid majority into media-panicked frenzied mess and it’s been swelling me up with sadness and anger all in one dangerous, sleepless, caffeinated package. And that’s bad news for everyone involved. Especially my nails.

My beef isn’t with people who stand on either side of the Carbon Tax debate. I have read a lot about the issue and I can see that there are some very strong arguments both for and against the proposed system. What I can’t abide is when ignorance and panic takes over and people start talking nonsense. Honestly Australia, it’s like watching sheep. Read, analyse, think!

Ok, so firstly to dispel a few of the more common, ill-conceived notions:

1) Global warming is real. There is no doubt. Every scientific organisation, every reputable expert in the field, and every international academic body has come to the conclusion that we are undoubtedly affecting the earth in a cataclysmic kind of way.

You might not be aware of this because in a bid to be objective, the Australian media has grossly misrepresented the two sides of the argument, making it sound like they are equal. They are not. The media has been sorely criticised for its inability to be truly objective (hey journalists, objective doesn’t mean 50:50, it means reporting the facts without spin). But don’t worry, it hasn’t noticed and continues to plough on, destroying the credibility of something that is so vital for our future.

2) Australia has the world’s highest per capita carbon dioxide emissions from energy use. It turns out that having three bathrooms, two fridges, air-conditioning in every room and electric blankets buzzing along whenever the weather drops below 15 degrees Celsius is having an effect. And it’s outrageous that Australians can feel affronted by the reality that carbon must be cut – whether that’s to be done by a carbon tax or another system somebody is going to have to pay.

3) The carbon tax is not a tax on air! It’s a Pigovian tax on the negative effects of carbon dioxide. Our current high levels of emissions are going to have a very detrimental effect on the cost that Australia will have to bear in the future (both financial and environmental). This tax is roughly evaluating the cost of each ton of carbon. Whether the measurements are right is anybody’s guess – it is a thing incredibly hard to measure and the experts really struggle with estimates; at this stage nobody can give a straight and sure answer.

4) It doesn’t matter what percentage of carbon is in the atmosphere. It’s not about percentages, but the effect. If I hear one more moron compare the amount of carbon to a piece of hair on a bridge, I am going to snap and, really, I think that’ll be a dark day for everyone.

5) The Great Depression 2.0 is not going to hit – only 0.02% of Australia’s 3 billion businesses are going to be affected. And that’s the top 500 polluters. And if you’ve found your way into those top 500 polluters, you deserve to pay because you are destroying our planet, and the effects are going to be much more expensive than $23 per ton of CO2. Whether the tax will have any kind of real effect is a worthy argument. Most economists say yes, but mainly on the industry. The majority maintain that households will be largely unaffected.

6) Spending money on short-term solutions isn’t really going to help. As it is, Australia isn’t making the effort that the rest of the developed world is. Taxing businesses to discourage environmentally-harmful behaviour, while earning extra revenue which can be put towards further environmental measures isn’t a bad thing – what the government will actually do with the money is a whole other issue all together (and one we need to stay on top of).

So now time for the real pros and cons. Quick disclaimer: I’m no economist, so these are what I make of the issue based on what I’ve read about it:

The pros of the tax are:

* It puts a limit on things. Finally. We need to start setting limits.
* It will encourage businesses to use less energy and reduce emissions in a controlled environment.
* It is going to take immediate effect as of July 2012. The speed of reaction is important in the environmental debate.
* It’s simple. Clear and simple.
* We know exactly what the cost will be over the following three to five years (after which it’ll move into an Emissions Trading Scheme, which has been supported by the majority of economists), which means it will be stable and predictable for businesses and consumers in this interim.
* It is a transparent system that will be harder to manipulate and bend by the worst culprits**
* It covers everybody at once, rather than separately across various sectors (as will need to be done when the ETS gets introduced), making it easier to fit into an international strategy.
* The revenue which is earned through the tax can be re-invested into further improving emissions targets and slowing the effect of global warming or compensating lower-socio-demographic groups who may be the most adversely affected.

I’d also like to add that several prominent economists have supported the carbon tax and it has been introduced in various guises in several countries, mostly in Europe. The Scandinavian countries led the charge in the 90s, and their carbon emissions have been greatly reduced. In 2000, the Finnish government put out a report stating that CO2 emissions had been reduced by about four million metric tons between 1990 and 1998 (roughly 7%), Sweden and Denmark reported cuts of approximately 15%, while Norway’s latest figures have been inconclusive due to interfering factors, including growth.

Naturally there are disadvantages:

*There are big question marks around how successful the tax will actually be in reducing emissions; firstly is it on a scale grand enough to make a difference, secondly is it structured in the best way possible, and thirdly will Australians reduce their emissions, or will they just budget around the extra costs?
*The tax may need to go through several phases and changes, and this could add costs to the process.
*The international competitiveness of Australian businesses (which might have to carry extra cost) and Australia for international businesses, might be reduced, causing economic repercussions. However this is thought to be unlikely.
***While it isn’t as easily manipulated, lobby groups in other countries, including Finland, have managed to reduce the taxes paid by certain sectors, making parts of the tax kind of irrelevant. Whether this will happen in Australia remains to be seen.
*The majority of economists – internationally and nationally – support the notion of an ETS over a tax, so there might be no need to introduce the tax for the first three to five years, when we can just hop straight to a potentially better solution.
*There is a chance that the tax will hit lower-income households harder, depending on a variety of factors.
*It’s a tax, and nobody likes those.

So these are my two pieces. I think it’s great to have debate, so long as we are debating the right factors and not just spreading nonsense – this issue is far too vital for us to take it lightly or just eat up media and government nonsense.

Penisman!

So I’m still chin-deep in edits of the book. Note to any overenthusiastic writers out there: do not agree to write 30,000 words in six weeks on top of your regular work. Just don’t.

Anyhoo I just wanted to pop on here to boast a little, because today I was fed by Dildoman! Or maybe the Incredible Cock. I haven’t decided on a name yet, and he didn’t stop to introduce himself. And really, what kind of superhero does that? I suppose one in a dildo costume, but I digress…

In lieu of our favourite online restaurant service being closed (I have a favourite and I don’t care how lame that makes me), Mark and I decided to branch out and try something different.

And that’s when we found this:

 Irresistible, non?

For the non-German speakers among you, the writing next to the burly penis-shaped man just lists the benefits of the service – huge selection, reliability, payment options and so on. What it doesn’t say is “your food comes with a side of dick.”

How could we resist?

We couldn’t.

Sadly here is where I let you down (or maybe make you breathe a deep sigh of relief) because, quite anti-climatically, the delivery guy did not come dressed as a dildo. Nor did he talk about penises. Although he was disoriented, unable to find our address and kind or rude, which means that at least he was being a dick in spirit.

Woohoo childhood moments!

Earlier today, out of nowhere, my mother sent me two pictures from my early childhood. This is pretty exciting since we didn’t own a camera in Poland and I only have a handful of images to prove that I was, in fact, quite hideous as a child.

We received our first camera at my first communion a few days before coming to Australia. It was chunky (but not in a good way), simple, black and one of the best presents I’ve ever received. Ever.

One day when I persuade Kate to scan some images, you will thank me for the gold it produced. It was the camera that recorded my most awkward moments. And, coming from the girl who once got wedged between a train and the platform, that’s saying a lot.

But back to the photos my mother sent me, because they reveal three rather important things:

1. My mother dressed us quite well, which just proves that any fashion choices made post age three were  my fault. That means all expressions of disgust should be sent to me. And also to her because WHAT WAS SHE THINKING?! (This will make sense when you see me circa 1986-2001)
2. There was a time when I wasn’t The Ugliest Child On Earth (the period I previously thought had lasted from age 2 until whenever it is that one ceases being a child). In fact, if you glance below, you'll note that I look rather cute as I coyly sniff my friend's ear. Not creepy at all three-year-old me.
3. My face has not changed since I was three-ish. Looking at these pictures is like looking at a weird shrunken version of myself. Which actually explains why I spent so many years as The Ugliest Child On Earth.

Side note: you can’t tell by these pictures but my sister was The Cutest Child On Earth, so I guess I should add one more thing:

     4. I look as cute as Kate! This is important to me. I wouldn’t call it the single biggest achievement of my life, but then again it might be.