New toy

Ever since Mark doused my netbook in orange juice and my USB key kicked the bucket I’ve been nervously watching my old laptop as it slipped in and out of dementia. So right around the time it decided to go into spontaneous hibernation (for the third time in the space of six minutes) Mark and I decided to get a new laptop.

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Mortified!

Want to talk about embarrassing?

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The future is nigh

Hey everyone, can you believe it’s the middle of the year already? I’m not sure how it happened because I swear time has slowed over the past couple of days. I think it’s all the packing which is still going on. Don’t worry; I’ve exhausted my ability to write about it.

Instead I’m going to tell you where Mark and I are going to be moving to for a week and – probably a little unfortunately for you – this is a topic that I’m going to hold on to for some time. In fact I might still be writing about it in a year’s time as “the time in my life when I was truly happy”…

Ready for the grand revelation?

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Jenga

Our apartment is tiny, so you would think that the Jenga skills I gained in my youth would come in handy when packing it up. Turns out I suck.

Welcome to my personal hell

So here’s the thing: I have curly hair and it has been raining for a good week now. Anybody with straight hair just flicked their tresses over their shoulder and looked out the window, “Really? It’s been raining? How weird that I didn’t notice”.

Anybody with curly hair just sighed and once again tried to ram their way through the door of the elevator. Didn’t work? Don’t worry, the air-con will eventually kill off the dampness, the hair will drop a fraction and you can get back onto stable ground.

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Finally real entertainment courtesy of Justin

Right, so I’m guessing you know who Justin Bieber is, right? You know, the pubescent ball of hair with the voice of a woman? The one that looks like he stumbled out of bed, past his kindergarten building, through a wind tunnel and onto your television screen?


You’re nodding your head and showing off your Supree “I love Justin” shirt? Good, then we’re on the same page…well not really, but at least you know who I’m talking about. We’ll address your poor fashion/music taste later.

For now I’d like to inform you that I’ve just discovered the most delightful thing:

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Absent

Yesterday I got an email from my blog. It went something like this:

Dear Deserter,

I hate you!

With sincere loathing,

Your blog

So I got the impression that maybe I shouldn’t go off and neglect it quite so much or it might eventually leave me…and then where would I put thoughts on my dysfunctional life? Maybe in a notebook…but that would eventually run away as well.

Anyway, to soften the blow of my absence, I thought I’d take a few minutes to explain what I’ve been up to, because it hasn’t all been margaritas, nudie runs and crossword puzzles.

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Random thoughts:

1) I wonder if my life would be more interesting if I had a life. Probably.

2) Tina Fay is hilarious.

3) I wonder if my life would be more interesting if I was Tina Fay.